Jeremy Sandford FanClub Archives ~ www.JeremySandford.org.uk

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The Warp

Country dashaway bag

On Friday nights, on the trains going down from Paddington to Wiltshire, there would always be many young country women returning from jobs that they had during the week in London, coming down to spend the weekends at their parents’ homes.

These young women had handbags into which they crammed many things, and inspired in me a poem of celebration.

The Country Dashaway Bag

O I was glum and I was gloomy

I didn’t seem to have the fun

other girls had

fact is I felt myself getting more and more disorientated

until really almost everything

seemed un utter drag

and then one day quite by chance

my best friend told me

about the jaunty soaraway saucy

Country Dashaway Bag!

only twelve and a half guineas

would you believe it – a snip

from Debenhams

now this Dashaway Bag it’s big, beautiful and super-packable

it’s got a sunny, funny, away-day ‘don’t care’ dash

about it that you can’t help loving

and comes with a jaunty jolly-colour

triptolene ‘look at me’ ‘how’m I doing?’

lime green sash

so very versatile, really it’s

equally at home for fondles in the Ritz

or being chatted up high on a mountain crag

is my Country Dashaway Bag

it came first as a very shrewd offer

from Anthea Logan’s Dremegale range of products

and here’s another thing I’d like to say

about the C.D.B. – it’s certainly shown me the way

to fabulous new freedom in skincare

dewfresh and oh – so – ready for

a tumble in the hay

or whatever you say

• go on say it!

I dare you

come what may!

and it was featured in the Observer Colour Mag

was my Country Dashaway Bag.

what do I put in it?

well I really cram it up

with fritzels, cheesi thynges

lo-los, atomiser,

negative ioniser, twigsters and fruities

that way I keep the weight off my tootsies.

also I pack in a cardigan, spare bra,

two shades of stocking, twin-set, Li-let,

sensible shoes, bedroom slippers,

‘Country Life’, a Mars Bar

and of course my dutch cap and spermicide

and odour-killer for Geoff’s car.

(Geoff’s my boyfriend by the way. He’s such a charmer.

I must get you together one of these days

I’m sure you’d get on like a house on fire!)

never out of place be it lordly or humble

just right for grand grope or midnight fumble

vulnerable and frangible as saucy apple crumble

is my Country Dashaway Bag.

and so here comes Friday and it’s on the train from Paddington

or in Geoff’s convertible down to the shires

and the Dashaway Bag is as button bright as I am,

really it’s a product that never tires

equally at home in dawntime nightboxes

or lounging around by old wood fires

or just picking those droll old-fashioned flowers.

it’s really changed my life

I have to brag

about my Country Dashaway Bag.

so now at any time, from city tripping

to quiet Country Dashaway weekends

I just pick up the Dashaway Bag

and am immediately on my way to visit friends.

now I’m ready for it

but never feel a slag

O it’s a girl’s very best way

to fly the flag

and the flag

says ‘hullo!

look at me!

how’m I doin?

I’m doin fine!’

does the saucy

soaraway

sunny

jaunty

give-away

funny

jokey

jolly colour

Country Dashaway Bag!

Jeremy Sandford FanClub Archives
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